Your Monthly Social Media Horoscope For April

What’s in store for you and the internet in the month ahead.

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Your Monthly Social Media Horoscope For April

  1. You got: Aries

    At the first lunar eclipse this month, April 15, a full moon, a flirtatious debate is likely to bring you closer to someone; if you’re part of a couple, you might refocus your internet activity around your partner. This is a time to prioritize and eliminate weaknesses: unfollow those who provide unnecessary clutter and undue distraction from those whose timelines are truly important to you. If your birthday is on or near the eclipse, you may be especially volatile, and you may be tempted to lash out at somebody on Twitter or Facebook. Be careful what you say, as this situation could quickly get out of hand. These moods will pass.

  2. You got: Taurus

    At or near the first lunar eclipse of the month, April 15, you may receive an emailed screenshot of a pertinent subtweet or copy-pasted Gchat discussion, either of which may reveal information that was intended to be kept from you. Conversely, you may inadvertently share your own secret with the wrong person; be careful with whom you Gchat/DM at this time. You may notice this month that your body is reacting physically to the time you’re spending on social media: listen to it and take care. Near the month’s second eclipse, April 28, particularly if your birthday falls near this date, you will be forced to reconcile with sudden change. You may find it is time to remove yourself from one or more social apps. If it isn’t working, don’t push it.

  3. You got: Gemini

    At the first lunar eclipse in April, on the 15th, your long-boiling internet crush will reach a boiling point. New information about this person will be revealed to you (perhaps she’ll endorse an RT you simply cannot, or he’ll post an Instagram photo of him with a girl who is probably not his sister), and you will have to use this information to make a decision. What you find out may be shocking, but it is best to know now, and move forward with the new moon at the end of the month. You’ll enjoy a high degree of internet visibility this month; bask in the faves and likes, and know that a new internet crush will always follow one that fizzles.

  4. You got: Cancer

    The mid-April lunar eclipse may require you to direct extra attention (and perhaps, though hopefully not, money) toward your phone, which may break, or which you may lose. In either case, your phone is likely to distract you from other areas of life this month, particularly around the 15th. This eclipse may also prove sensual for Cancer signs, so if you’re getting a lot of Twitter/Facebook attention at this time, it likely means something. The second lunar eclipse, marking a new moon at the end of the month, will open new pathways in your social media life. You are likely to experience sudden changes with a friend and/or social network to which you belong; one possibility is that someone (or something) you relied upon in your internet life will no longer be available to you.

  5. You got: Leo

    Near the mid-month lunar eclipse, someone may be disloyal to you, or try to claim something of yours as their own. Be wary of Twitter joke-stealers, or those who might quote you without attribution. Careful, though, that you do not invent social media sins where they do not exist; your jealousy may simply get the best of you this month. You may be tempted to overcompensate, and to over-post your life across your social media accounts, but it would be wiser to keep as private as possible until the end of April. Someone who influences your internet life (Mark … Zuckerberg? Or someone!) may reveal major changes toward the end of the month.

  6. You got: Virgo

    The mid-month lunar eclipse will bring with it a hazy fog of miscommunication and/or confusion—perhaps you will notice that your romantic partner hasn’t been up front with you about whom he or she is chatting with or keeping track of online. If you’re single, you may be find your accounts being followed by a potential new love interest. Toward the end of the month, you may become overwhelmed by Instagram photos of bright sun and tropical locations and decide you need to travel somewhere and take lots of pictures too.

  7. You got: Libra

    At the first lunar eclipse of the month, which falls in your sign, you will be ready to embrace change and start something new. Perhaps you will finally join Snapchat; regardless, now is the time to consider the way you spend your time online, and whether some of them could be cut from your social media repertoire. You may find yourself heavily trolled mid- to late-April: do not engage. This is a month to use the “block” button with abandon, as your judgment will be swift but clear.

  8. You got: Scorpio

    The mid-month eclipse will reveal to you, Scorpio, news which had previously been kept from you, be it an untoward DM or a Twitter friendship you find displeasing. Near this time you will want to reach out widely for advice and comfort, perhaps Gchatting with contacts outside your immediate roster. This may help you prepare, for the second lunar eclipse at the end of this month is likely to bring about a significant decision about your relationship, whether to end it, become more serious, or begin a new one. Additionally, as April wraps up, everyone around you will be tweeting about something, and you are not going to know what they’re getting all worked up about.

  9. You got: Sagittarius

    On or around April 15, the lunar eclipse, you will come across a friend’s tweet or Instagram photo you find particularly shocking. You may be moved to send links to this event to several of your friends for several days afterward—they may not share your surprise, so be cautious not to vent too widely. Toward the middle of the month, a friend will need extensive support from you, her/his Gchat therapist. The end of the month will find you feeling tense about a romantic development: perhaps an ex is reappearing in your networks, or your partner is fav-flirting too liberally. Keep an eye out.

  10. You got: Capricorn

    April is a rich month for the Capricorn’s communications, so you may enjoy a number of satisfying new Gchat/email/Twitter contacts, or a new depth of friendship with ones you’d made previously. This will be a stressful month for work, however, so take care not to let your newly exciting social media life distract you too much from your RL. Toward the end of the month, at the second lunar eclipse, you may finally be able to move one of these internet flirtations offline.

  11. You got: Aquarius

    The beginning of the month may find you restless, impatient to make major changes to your social media life. Do not impulsively quit Twitter or Facebook; think it over, and see if you feel the same way in May. The end of the month will bring more dramatic action to your internet life, whether affecting you personally or the social network in question at large. Look around you; you will find people with whom to commiserate/Gchat. May will bring resolution; if the formatting or design of a site you like changes, you’ll be over it by then.

  12. You got: Pisces

    The early part of April may bring you undesirable financial revelations—hopefully you have not been investing heavily in Bitcoin, for example. The eclipse on the 28th will be great for your ability to communicate. You may have your most-faved tweet ever near this time, or a streak of very popular ones. You may attract so much attention (whether romantic, or in new followers, or both) that it overwhelms you, so take the time to evaluate your options. You don’t need to follow everyone back who follows you.


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